Wake Me Up When September Ends, by Green Day
I've lived just long enough that it's easy to get caught up in reflection over how much time has passed. I don't let myself dwell on it too much, but it still seems like the years have disappeared far too quickly.
And I have wasted more of my life than I care to think about doing little more than hiding from life. It's hard not to wonder what I could have done with all the time I spent living in fear - fear of what might have happened if I'd allowed myself to be who and what I am, and fear of a God that I was convinced was poised, lightning bolt in hand, to strike me down the second I made a wrong move.
Now that I no longer hate myself, I'm making a greater effort to make the most of whatever time I have left in this life, but it can be hard to break those old habits. If only September could slow down just a little bit...
2 comments:
I am really sorry to hear that you hated yourself. I am also really glad to hear that you have moved on.
Unfortunately it's all too common for those of us who grew up in conservative churches. But fortunately it is possible to find healing and move on with one's life...
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