Happy Thanksgiving

Like all members of the secret gay conspiracy to destroy everything, I plan to fully indulge in my sinful gay lifestyle over the four-day weekend. In fact, as soon as I'm done posting this I will be heading down to my parents' house for Thanksgiving dinner. I'll be bringing the pie (unpatriotically sweetened with agave instead of good old-fashioned sugar). My mom also asked me to bring a DVD to watch after dinner, so I've pulled out my copy of Lord, Save Us From Your Followers to corrupt her with.

I'll be spending tomorrow at a board game day being hosted by some friends who, like me, think that sounds like a lot more fun than endless hours fighting the frenzied crowds at the mall. So if the economy doesn't recover in 2011, you'll know who's really to blame.

Saturday, after helping put up the advent decorations at church, I plan to see the new Harry Potter movie with my sister, after which we'll no doubt cast a few Imperius curses on unsuspecting Muggles in the name of the dark lord before grabbing some dinner.

After church on Sunday I'll be helping my parents put up that grand symbol of Paganism, the Christmas tree. A couple of the ornaments even depict Santa Claus. And then I'll cap off the weekend by watching the Amazing Race, which just spent the last two legs boosting the economies of Muslim countries.

In all seriousness, I do have much to be thankful for - a loving family, a great church, a stable job, reasonably good health and the freedom to enjoy them all. God is indeed good. Have a blessed holiday.